A Pain in the Boob

I am repeatedly saddened at how many people I speak with who tell me they tried breastfeeding but it just didn't work out for them. I understand it, but I hate to hear it. Before I gave birth, I was told that the most important factors in succeeding with nursing are having support and self determination and I agree. While breastfeeding is the most natural and healthy thing you can do for yourself and your baby, it does not exactly come naturally and there are hurdles that can be very challenging with or without loving support. There have been moments where, were I not so determined, I could have felt like I just wasn't good at breastfeeding. This past week is a great example because having a blocked milk duct has definitely been a test in dedication.

I am very lucky to have a husband, mother, friends, midwives and a doula who support me in nursing. Even with this foundation, I have also seen two lactation consultants for help. I believe you can NEVER have too much of the right kind of support. I feel for people who have no one to support their decision to nurse and it infuriates me that someone could be made to feel weird or guilty for wanting to do what is best for their infant. Let me just say that the previous statement is not simply my opinion: breastfeeding, when physically possible, IS what is best for an infant-FACT. I can see how negativity and guilt can greatly effect a new mom as I have also had some unsolicited "help" which was not helpful at all, in fact it was discouraging. So, I believe it is important to follow your gut and have people you trust to ask questions to. I have not yet been to a La Leche League meeting but I plan to because I hear they are a great support system for nursing mothers.

What my newest breastfeeding 'adventure' has taught me:

A blocked/plugged milk duct is when there is an obstruction blocking your milk from flowing. It can either be superficial (on the nipple) or down in the duct. I don't care where it is, it is not pleasant. The symptoms usually include a hardened lump in the breast that may be hot or swollen and feel bruised.  Personally, it felt like there had been an all-out mystery assault on my left breast and I was suffering the consequences. They say it comes on gradually but I did not notice it until it was really there. I am mentioning this just in case someone reading this could be nervous that the symptoms they are reading about on whatever website they googled don't exactly match their own-everyone is different. My biggest worry when my breast began to really hurt was 1) that it was mastitis and 2) it would never go away. Neither of these fears came to pass but they haunted me nonetheless. I learned from our midwife that mastitis is HORRIBLE and you know if you have that because you feel incredibly sick; like death. I never felt sick just like I had a lot of pain in my breast. I am not exactly sure what caused my blocked duct because there is a laundry list of reasons it can happen. I did have a blocked pore which looked like a small white spot on my nipple and it hurt -especially after I tried to open it by poking it with an acupuncture needle (I don't recommend this, regardless of TCM training it just isn't fun). There is a good chance I got this bleb from an improper latch. As I have discussed, buddha baby is mildly tongue-tied and we don't have the best latch. The majority of pain was within the breast and it hurt whenever I put ANY pressure on it including holding buddha baby on that side or trying to sleep on my stomach (which can also cause a plug).

Resolving the problem:

OK, so I had a block, if you currently have one I am sure all you care about is how to get rid of it. I was very diligent in performing all the tasks to rid myself of this wretched thing. Plus, I was motivated by knowing that a blocked duct left untreated can turn into mastitis and that is a game I have no interest in playing. I was told by our midwife to put a Castor oil pack on it with as hot of heat as I could stand- I did this...a lot. That part actually felt good as well as taking hot showers. I massaged my breast, which hurt like hell but I did it before I nursed, after I nursed and in the shower. Speaking of nursing, I nursed and nursed and nursed. I nursed on the painful breast almost every time he was hungry even if it was only a little and this pain made massage feel like a cake-walk. I didn't neglect my other boob but I really wanted this blockage out. I also fed in many different positions, including one where I leaned over him as he lay on the bed. It was a little awkward but I read that the gravity really helps bring out the plug. Something, or everything, worked and I am no longer in pain. I did not see the plug come out but I knew it was gone when I started filling with milk and didn't want to cry when there was a little pressure on my chest. I was expecting to feel it come out and have some big release or ahhh moment. I suppose I didn't feel it plug and thus I did not feel it release.

I just want to take a moment and say that if you are pregnant and planning to breastfeed, please don't be scared by these things. The point here isn't that nursing is hard or unbearable, the point is that at times it takes perseverance. There are challenges that you will face and sometimes you will need support. People will tell you the downsides of breastfeeding even though the upside is the most precious gift you can give to your baby- personalized liquid gold made just for his or her perfect little body. Yes, you are the only one who can feed the baby, unless you pump and bottle-feed which I have not yet been able to bring myself to do. Also, you tend to wake up more often than with formula baby and sometimes your body goes through things like blocked milk ducts or cracked nipples. Is it worth it? ABSOLUTELY!! There is no such thing as formula that is even close to breastmilk-- not even close-- and that is what your baby is designed to live on. Breastmilk is a perfect food. It is a baby's instinct to BF and that bond you create is beyond words....